The Stressors:/ Of having a job..or not...

Work.





Ugh...we either hate our job, or we love it. After all, we get paid right? Some our our jobs are really simple, and others are complex and stressful. Though, it is possible to reduce the stress of everyday work. Maybe you have a job where you have to wake up at 5 in the morning, or even earlier. Well, make sure you get enough rest. No, four hours of sleep will not do you any good. AT LEAST eight hours will give you enough energy the next day. You will also find that the better rested you are, the less stressed out you will be.
Stress isn't always bad. Small amounts of stress can help you perform under pressure and motivate you to do things.

Not everybody resonds the same way to stress. There are three different ways people respond to stress:



Anger- Angry and agitated. You're easily heated, and overly emotional. You're unable to sit still.

Withdrawal- Withdrawn or depressed response. You show very little emotion or energy.

Both-Tense and frozen under pressure. You look like you are not able to function correctly, but deep down you are very agitated.

You may feel like the stress in your life is out of your control and impossible to handle, but you can always control the way you respond. Managing stress is all about taking charge: taking charge of your thoughts, your emotions, your schedule, your environment, and the way you deal with problems. Stress management involves changing the stressful situation when you can, changing your reaction when you can’t, taking care of yourself, and making time for rest and relaxation.



Maybe you have a boss or co-worker putting to much pressure on you? Well, the best way to handle this, is knowing WHY you feel stressed. If your boss is giving you too many hours or making you do too many things at once, simply, talk to them about it. Let them know you feel like you are doing too much and ask if there is any way you could change that. Dont whine and complain to them about it. Of course they won't feel bad when you are being negative or rude. Compromise with them or let them know you feel too pressured. Maybe you arent able to get what you want. If this is the case, make sure you have enough YOU time put into your schedule. If you do things you LOVE doing after a stressful day, its true that it reduces the amount of stress. So get out or stay in doing something you love doing. Even if you can't do it everyday, at least do it every once in a while. If a Co-worker is bothering you, once again, talk to your boss about it, NOT THE CO-WORKER. Your boss will more than likely handle the situation better than you would yourself.

If you have a spiritual side to you, pray! IT WILL HELP. You will feel so much more calm when you pray. Don't ever for a second think it is a waste of time or you won't get anything from it. That is not true!

All in all, jobs can be stressful, but it's just part of life. If everything was SO EASY, how would you learn from trials that make you into a stronger and more smarter person? If you deal with the stress and problems of life in a positive way, You'll start to see for yourself, why you were given the stress/trial.:] NOBODY's LIFE IS A VACATION THEIR ENTIRE LIFE.

JOBLESS

Another Stressor can be JOBLESS. Maybe you've been searching for a job for MONTHS, and still no luck. Don't blame yourself. The economy is bad, so it's even more difficult to find a job. The only thing you can do is search for a job daily and follow up. If you fill out an application, and don't hear anything back for a week or so, follow up and call. This gives you an even greater chance of getting the job, because it shows the person hiring you, that you actually care and WANT the job. Don't give up, all of your hard work of searching for a job will pay off sooner or later.:] You see those bums on the side of the road? well, YOU WILL NOT END UP LIKE THEM IF YOU KEEP UP THE HARD WORK. You'll end up like them if you screw up your life with drugs, alcohol, sex, etc. Besides, Alot of them still look decent enough to go out and find a job, but they already feel like no one would hire them..which is true if you have that attitude.



So lesson learned...KEEP a positive attitude and NEVER give up.

Suicide

You're sitting in your dark closet and you're feeling the lowest you've ever felt in a long time. Suddenly thoughts of taking your life away fill your head. You are scared to do it, but you feel like killing yourself is the only way to get rid of your pain. You go downstairs and you see your family having a good time with eachother. You think to yourself, they could care less about me. You sneak a knife into your pocket. You go back up to your room and you stare at your knife for a long while. You want to do it, but you're afraid to, so you begin talking to your friends about how you want to kill yourself. You hope they will be able to talk your way out of it. You're friends don't take you seriously. This makes you feel worse. By the time your friends realize you werent kidding...It's too late....

Your friends call your cell phone over and over again and your answering machine is what they hear. The next morning your parents come up to your room to find you laying on your floor. With no heartbeat. Your family and friends are heartbroken. Some of them will get depression because of your death. They cry about you every day, wishing they could of done something to stop your suicide. They blame themselves because they feel they failed as parents, as siblings, as friends, as boyfriends or girlfriends. They beat themselves up over your death and they miss you. They will never get you back, no matter what they say or do. Your little sister cries about you all the time. She cries herself to sleep. She hangs a picture of you next to her bed. She misses playing with you. She misses you hugging her and tickling her. She even misses you insulting her...



Your little brother misses playing videogames with you. He loses interest in the things he loved doing. He locks himself in his room crying to himself. Your older brother has to come home early from his mission. For your funeral. Everybody cries. Everyone is miserable.

Do you want this to happen? Suicide is a selfish act. It not only hurts you, but your family. Your friends. Everyone who EVER communicated with you.


Suicide.

suicidal Thoughts begin to appear in the deeper stages of depression. You become so depressed, nothing seems to cheer you up. You are miserable and you are helpless. Others around you give up on you. Your family and friends back away because you PUSH them away. You are frusterated with yourself and you feel like suicide will be the best solution to everything. You begin to think you are an obstable in everyone's lives so you are doing them a favor. WRONG.



SO MANY PEOPLE LOVE YOU!!! Don't give up faith or hope. If you killed yourself, so many people will grieve over your death. You are loved don't ever forget that. If you are having suicidal thoughts, please talk to someone about it. Don't hold anything in, because it never does any good. The first people you should talk to about it, is your family. They will always be there for you and will help you through it. YOU NEED HELP! Don't deny it. Suicidal thoughts are very serious.

Tears
By Karen Millet


Standing all alone
In the midst of darkness
At times feeling
So
Afraid
Tears
Of rage
Of fear
Of a broken heart…

Sometimes glimpsing
A ray of light
Many
Miles
Away.

Chasing after it
Frantic footsteps
Echoing…
Only to watch
It fade from sight
Tears

Of exhaustion
Of frustration
Of a broken heart…

But keep walking
One step at a time
Keep praying
To see that light
Until one day

It stays
Growing ever brighter
Tears
Of pleading

Of hope
Of strength beyond my own
Lifted up
By angel’s wings

Rushing through the darkness
Feeling it disappear
Light
Brilliant
Glorious
True

The darkness cannot penetrate
Tears
Of joy
Of peace
Of a mending heart
Catching rays of light
To fill my soul
Leaving the darkness
Far behind
Beauty all around
And no more

Tears


FACTS ABOUT DEPRESSION AND SUICIDE:

15 percent of teenagers with untreated depression commit suicide

In 2000, 10.6 out of every 100,000 persons died by suicide [.01 percent].

For children age 10 to 14, the rate was 1.5 per 100,000 [.0015 percent]

For children 15 to 19, the rate was 8.2 deaths per 100,000 [.0082 percent]
In any given year, about seven percent - between 13 million and 14 million people - will experience a depressive disorder.

_ Of those who develop depression, only about 20 percent will receive adequate treatment.

_ About 16 percent of adults will experience depression at some point in their life.

_ About 97 percent of those reporting depression also reported that their work, home life and relationships suffered as a result.

_ Depression is also known to weaken the immune system, making the body more susceptible to physical illness.

_ Two out of every three people who commit suicide visited their health care provider in the month prior.

_ Two out of every three people who commit suicide have talked about suicide to friends or family.

_ Suicide is the third leading cause of death for people between the ages of 15 and 24.

_ Suicide is the sixth leading cause of death for children between the ages of 5 and 14


People often turn to suicide because they are seeking relief from pain. Remember that relief is a feeling. And you have to be alive to feel it. You will not feel the relief you so desperately seek, if you are dead.

Some people will react badly to your suicidal feelings, either because they are frightened, or angry; they may actually increase your pain instead of helping you, despite their intentions, by saying or doing thoughtless things. You have to understand that their bad reactions are about their fears, not about you.

But there are people out there who can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel. They will simply care for you.

i've come to learn that SUICIDE is NEVER the answer. It will only make things worse. If any suicidal thoughts come to mind, shut them out by thinking of the blessings in your life. be around people who make you smile and laugh when you are feeling this low. I promise you will cheer up in no time.

Always remember, Everything will get better in the end. We all have problems and trials in our lifetime, but if we are able to cope with them in a postive way and learn from our trials, it makes us into a stronger person.

REMEMBER YOU ARE LOVED. And everynight, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep...

Forgive, Forget, & Move On

Forgive: To cease to end resentment against someone. To let go of any grudges or bad thoughts of a person.

Forget: To not think about past memories (good or bad). To move forward and think postive about the of the future.

Move On: The hardest one of them all. To Forgive and Forget.




Forgiveness.

For Some of us, this is hard to do. No matter how hard it seems to forgive someone who hurt you, it is not impossible. In order forgive someone, you need to let go of all your pride. You cannot be truely sorry if you don't let go of all your selfish thoughts, especially of the person that hurt you. Forgivness is the first step to moving on. Maybe you don't want to forgive this person? Ever. Well, think about it. Will it do you any good for the future? Will it make you happier if you don't forgive anyone that did you wrong? How will this affect your other relationships or future relationships?

Martin Luther King, jr.:
"We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies."

Mohandas K. Gandhi:
"Forgiveness is choosing to love. It is the first skill of self-giving love."

Forgiveness not only helps you emotionally...the benefits of forgiveness:

Lower blood pressure
Stress reduction
Less hostility
Better anger management skills
Lower heart rate
Lower risk of alcohol or substance abuse
Fewer depression symptoms
Fewer anxiety symptoms
Reduction in chronic pain
More friendships
Healthier relationships
Greater religious or spiritual well-being
Improved psychological well-being

When you experience hurt or harm from someone's actions or words, whether this is intended or not, you may begin experiencing negative feelings such as anger, confusion or sadness, especially when it's someone close to you. These feelings may start out small. But if you don't deal with them quickly, they can grow into something even bigger. They may even begin to crowd out positive feelings. Grudges filled with resentment, vengeance and hostility take root when you keep thinking about hurtful events or situations, replaying them in your mind over and over again.

Soon, you may find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness. You may feel trapped and may not see a way out. It's very hard to let go of grudges at this point and instead you may remain resentful and unforgiving.

If there is someone in your life you have trouble forgiving. Work on it and soon you will find it easier to forgive them. Once you forgive, you will find that peace you've always wanted.




Forget.

"I forgave, now I have to forget??" Yeah, forgeting about something or someone that hurt you can be even more difficult than forgiving, but it's the only way to move on and be HAPPY. It may take awhile, but when you forget, you will find yourself more positive about the future. Maybe a boyfriend or girlfriend cheated on you. Well, the person doing the cheating will sooner or later feel sorry about what he/she is doing or what they have done. They will be the unhappy ones. Maybe the person who hurt you is the one forgiving you first? Should you push them away and still stay mad at them? Of course not. Be mature about the situation and accept their apology. Attention is limited. You can only focus on so many things at a time, and the less you focus on something the more it fades away in your mind. So the key to how to forget something is to place your attention somewhere else.

"I woke up and noticed the sun shined a little brighter that morning. It was because I was able to forget about my negative past and forgive all those that had hurt me."



Moving On.

Moving on heals a broken heart. Once you are able to forgive and forget, you are able to finally move on. Time heals everything. There may be some days the negative thought may come into your mind. Don't let them linger there. Quickly think of something else that makes you happy, or go out and do something that makes you happy! Eventually, the thoughts of a person that hurt you will fully disappear and you won't even think twice about it when it comes into mind again. A breakup, A divorce, A person who gossiped about you, A mother who criticized you, A friend that turned on you. All are very difficult, but believe me, If you Work on Forgiving and Forgetting and remember the important things in life. Your thoughts will become positive and you will find yourself alot happier. Don't let ANYONE bring you down. No one can MAKE you feel the way you do. It is all YOU.

You forgive me for liking you too much,
And I'll forgive you for not liking me enough.

You forgive me for missing you so,
And I'll forgive you for being so cold.

You forgive me for the loud racing of my heart,
And I'll forgive you for not hearing it.

You forgive me for playing your games,
And I'll forgive you for toying with my emotions.

You forgive me for finding you so attractive,
And I'll forgive you for not noticing.

You forgive me for raising you up so high,
And I'll forgive you for bringing me down so low.

You forgive me for wanting to be with you,
And I'll forgive you for avoiding me.

You forgive me for being so pathetic,
And I'll forgive you for taking advantage of it.

You forgive me for not being able to let go,
And I'll forgive you for never having latched on.

You forgive me for having hopes and dreams,
And I'll forgive you for crushing them.

Forgiveness brings inner peace.
Do we have a deal?