Where I was for almost nine months.....

http://www.diamondranchacademy.com/


check it out if you're interested

uh happiness?

Happiness

We all hear the word, we all want it, but we don't know how to obtain it the RIGHT way.


The Fray


Happiness is just outside my window
Would it crash blowing 80-miles an hour?
Or is happiness a little more like knocking
On your door, and you just let it in?

Happiness feels a lot like sorrow
Let it be, you can’t make it come or go
But you are gone- not for good but for now
Gone for now feels a lot like gone for good

Happiness is a firecracker sitting on my headboard
Happiness was never mine to hold
Careful child, light the fuse and get away
‘Cause happiness throws a shower of sparks

Happiness damn near destroys you
Breaks your faith to pieces on the floor
So you tell yourself, that’s enough for now
Happiness has a violent roar

Happiness is like the old man told me
Look for it, but you’ll never find it all
Let it go, live your life and leave it
Then one day, wake up and she’ll be home
Home, home, home


The past few years, I have been struggling to be happy. I would always find the negative side of things and I was really reactive. I was depressed and have had issues with this traced back to when I was younger. It was around fifth grade my parents finally noticed something was wrong and took me to go see a counselor. They soon became helpless when I wouldnt respond to the medication or treatment in a positive way. Depression isn't like the blues you get every once in a while. It drags on forever and it feels like nothing will work. You lose interest in things you used to enjoy. People close to you distant themselves because not many people like to be around negative people for very long. Your life just seems to get worse and you feel like you are inside a maze, but can't find your way out. You lose sight of the light and people are telling you which way to go, but you have a hard time trusting people. You push people away because you want to go your own way. But this never works..

I was crying out for help...


Depression can be treated. DONT GIVE UP ON YOURSELF OR OTHERS TRYING TO HELP YOU!! There are many different causes of depression. The first step to treating your depression is to find out what may have caused it. Lost of a loved one, failed relationships, bad relationships, etc. Happiness is not impossible, but in order to obtain it, you have to put in effort to reaching it. Go out and get help from a nearby therapist, counselor, or anybody in that profession. Also, look in to getting medication. I promise it helps! Don't push those close to you. Try listening to what they have to say. They love you and want to help you! Start doing things that you love to do! Also, stay busy. This will help keep your mind off things you worry or stress about. If you believe in a higher power, go to that higher power for help. I am LDS so I have a belief and I go to my heavenly father for help. Praying and reading my scriptures always puts me in a better mood after.:)


Why am I talking about this? Well, Because I am still trying to find true happiness. I want to help others as well. I know what it feels like and I promise you, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! I may not know you, but i know there are people out there who love you and want nothing but the best for you.



Finding My Place
By Karen Millet

I can't tell you who I am
Because sometimes I don't know.
This world at times so vast
I'm unsure of where to go.
So many different people,
We don't all fit a perfect mold.
A thousand varied voices
Though I can't believe all I'm told.
So who decides what's right?
And who decides what's wrong?
How will I know if I'm singing
The right words to my own song?
Sometimes I don't know,
The person I'm going to be
But the place that I end up
Can be determined only by me.
So I'm finding my place
One small step at a time
And I'm writing my own song
Rhyme by rhyme...


On July 4th 2008, my parents dropped me off at a treatment center in Hurricane, Utah called Diamond Ranch Academy. It was the hardest and most emotional thing I ever had to go through, but i can honestly say it was worth every minute and penny. I learned so much! I have been blessed and I am thankful for my parents for letting me go through that experience. I know a year ago I would be sayin the complete opposite, but now that I sucessfully completed the real life transition program, I look back and am proud of myself for accomplishing something so big! Not everybody gets to go through what i went through and complete it.


life is tough, but if you tell yourself, "whatever happens, happens for a reason," I'm sure you'll start to believe it:]